


I don't want it

by AmyYma2770



Series: Non conventional people [10]
Category: Lucifer (TV)
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-12-26
Updated: 2017-12-26
Packaged: 2019-02-22 06:16:15
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,672
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13160994
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AmyYma2770/pseuds/AmyYma2770
Summary: Chloe Decker is a badass LAPD detectiveWith a special consultant by her side.But is he just a consultant?And is she ready to break her walls and all the rules for him?For sure, he will do everything for her. He has already done it.





	I don't want it

**Author's Note:**

  * Inspired by [The Devil's hands](https://archiveofourown.org/works/12972423) by [AmyYma2770](https://archiveofourown.org/users/AmyYma2770/pseuds/AmyYma2770). 



> I was not sure to write a second chapter of "The Devils' hands"  
> In the end, I have decided to do it, but ad a separare story.  
> Not my stile writing a first person fic, but I want to be consistent with the previous one.  
> Hope you enjoy it  
> And, of course, forgive my mistake  
> Thank you in advance for your time and comments.
> 
> My dear Eleonor Bennet, I keep my promise: this is Chloe's chapter.

I’m tired. Really tired.  
It’s about midnight and I’m still working on this damn case. I don’t want to stop until that monster will be captured.  
It is a priority for me, for the entire department, for all my coworkers: nobody can kidnap, torture and kill children and simply gets away.  
Pierce was clear on this point: this case was the number one on our priority list. And I know how much pushy and rude he could be when on a case.

There was a time I had loved this side of his and maybe him too: his direct way to approach me, to put me under pressure and sometimes to annoy me but just to solve crimes and close cases. I loved working with him, building up my career and being surprised by this mysterious man slowly revealing himself, telling me his deepest secrets, creating intimacy in my car, making my heart beat faster and faster just looking at him moving furniture around the office.  
I must confess, I was so silly proud of being proclaimed his best detective, of being the only one he trusted on, the only one he was soft to. Until I discovered the truth.  
I still shiver thinking of that moment: I was scared, I felt betrayed and stupid. And terribly guilty for what I had done to…

“Detective, it is becoming cold outside. And it is too dark to see anything. Tomorrow morning it will be better”  
Your velvet dulcet tone breaks my train of thought and revert my attention to you, to the light smile and soft expression you always have when you look at me.  
You, my partner, my friend, my I don’t know what now. You, the Devil.  
“It’s getting late and you have your club to take care of. I’m sorry, Lucifer, I’m the usual workaholic, you know” I’m able to reply, grabbing the lapels of your jacket that you have silently put over my shoulder, thinking I’m cold because I’m shivering  
And yes, I’m shivering as I’m cold. But I recently started shivering for what I have discovered surrounding me. Surrounding all of us.  
And I don’t mean you as the Devil, Maze as a demon or Amenadiel as an angel: no, oddly, this doesn’t scare me at all. But becoming aware of the real evil in our daily life, of how many demons and damned angels live among us and just wait for the right time to harm us, to raise a celestial war that can destroy all of us..that really terrifies me.  
I’m afraid for Trixie and for my mom, so easy to capture to destroy me, for Linda and Charlotte, the more vulnerable members of my family. And I’m afraid for you.

“For me, Detective? I’m the Devil you know now. I’m strong and immortal and with lots of loyal warriors at my side”, you laughed at me the first time we talked about it.  
But your enemies know what I mean to you: they can use me against you, like Pierce did. And I was so desperately looking for someone to be special to that I was too blind to realize what was going on. I almost turned my back to you, abandoned you. I hurt you deeply. And even though you have forgiven me, I can’t do it. Not yet.  
I barely can look you into your eyes: you probably think I’m still struggling with you as the Devil. I know it is because I’m afraid of seeing that sadness and mad jealousy again. The sadness and jealousy I was responsible for. 

“I’ll drive you to Lux and then go home” I don’t want to leave you. I don’t want to spend the rest of the night alone. I don’t want to spend the rest of my life alone. If you just asked me….  
“Would like to stay in the penthouse, dear? I know you will go on working at home, as your spawn is with Daniel. You can take some advantages from that: you will have lot of good coffee, plenty of healthy food, lot of space to spread all your paper around and me reach you out to help you-I raise my eyebrow-…to cheer you up with a glass of expensive whiskey or some music”  
I smile “Ok, I’ll stay. It sounds good”  
We drive back to Lux, my attention focused on the streets, you humming a song, maybe for your performance tonight.  
I love when you play your piano: your face’s lines soften, your shoulders relax, you seem to forget everything around you. You are not the fallen angel, you are not the evil punisher, you are not the LAPD civilian consultant, you are not the notorious playboy, club owner in expensive 3 pieces suits. You are just Lucifer Morningstar, your own man judged for your own doing. You belong just to yourself, not even to me.  
I would spend all the night sitting here, enjoying the drink the bartender has created for me on your own request, envying Maze who now is crossing the room to sit on the piano, crossing her long, sexy legs.  
I would really like to let my barriers down, to live a little.  
But I have a job to do.

The penthouse is silent and warm, the couch so inviting for a short nap. Maybe a shower can help me.  
Your bathroom always impresses me: it is as big as my bedroom.  
The hot water runs over me, over my hair: wish the water took away all the bad things and left Chloe. Only Chloe “boring second name” Jane Decker. The Chloe who kissed you on the beach. Before poisoning, before Vegas, Candy, Pierce, the Sinnerman, the fall and the wings.  
I find myself humming the same melody you did in the car: I feel myself safe here, in your house, with you.  
I’m myself only with you.

I reach the couch, my hair just toweled, a loose T-shirt covering my hips and there you are: ““Lucifer, I didn’t hear you”  
You turn to me and look surprised. But you are so good at hiding your emotions: “Would you like a drink, dear?”  
I shake my head: “No thank you. I need my brain at my best” and then pass you through. And the only thing I want it to let my head rest on your chest, hear your heat beating like in the song you have performed for me once.  
I start working while you have your shower, put your silk robe on, pour a glass of whiskey and move to the balcony, to see the stars you love so much. The stars that you, the Lightbringer, has created eons ago.  
My head spins, I can’t deal with all this stuff: demons, angels, eternity, mortality.  
Maybe a drink is not a bad idea after all. But going to the bar means passing in front of your bedroom. And tonight, I’m too weak to resist. Or too strong.

And then you reach your bedroom, take your robe off and turn to leave it on the armchair where you stared at me, drunk in your bed, for a whole night.  
And you look surprised for the second time. Because here I’m, against the wall, shyly smiling.  
“I thought you were back home” you manage to say  
I step closer, a fire burning in my throat, in my chest, in my belly as it never happened to me before this night and gently grab your hand.  
“Detective, I didn’t include myself in the benefits to stay here, but..well, I’m available” you try to sound the same ass I know. But you failed you know.  
I smile “Shut up, Lucifer” and slowly lay down, never leave your eyes.  
In the end, here I’m, in your bed, sober and half naked, my skin against your silk sheets, my hands on your arms, your warm arms and I’m so cold. Inside. Just now I realize how much I need you.  
But you don’t want to touch me: you still think to be a monster not deserving my love and my compassion.  
How can I convince you I really, desperately need you?  
I touch your hands, talk to you and slowly you react, caressing my face, kissing my mouth, my neck, your fingers and your lips bringing me halfway to ecstasy.  
“I would do everything for you. Everything” you whisper in my ear. And I shrink at your words, because I know it is true: you have already done it.  
You immediately stop “What’s wrong, love? I’m crushing you, sorry. I’m so heavy for you”  
I look into your dark, deep eyes, so close now:” I don’t want it”  
You frown, confused.  
“I know you would do it.  
You have killed your brother for me. You have died twice for me. You have gone back to Hell for me.  
I don’t want all this power. On you”  
You smile, your beautiful, precious, sincere, warm smile.  
“Yes, you have power on me. But you are the only one I want to have that power on me.  
You are my everything, Chloe: and I’m ok with it.”  
I close my eyes when your hands run over my body, your voice in my ear whispering all the words I need to hear, until I fall asleep.

I wake up for a while during the night, something is tickling my face  
I find you sleeping over me, your head on my shoulder, your tousled hair against my neck.  
I turn my head and see your arm stretched out over the sheet, covering mine, your hand grabbing my hand gently, but firmly.  
I will always have power on you, you will always catch me whenever I’m in need.  
I’m a human being and you are the Devil  
I’m Chloe Jane Decker and you are Lucifer Morningstar  
We can’t change it. As we can’t change the fact I love you. And you love me.  
And you sleeping peacefully in my arms is all that matters.


End file.
